" OH, HOLD ON MY DEAR. YOUR BREAKTHROUGH IS NEAR! "

A message for those in the waiting from the heart of The Father.

" OH, HOLD ON MY DEAR. YOUR BREAKTHROUGH IS NEAR! "

When I had my first child at 20 years old, nothing could have prepared me for the pain I felt during the long 24-hour labor, and especially during the birth itself. I was so exhausted that between contractions I would fall asleep and start talking in my sleep about people from the shows I had been watching. I was completely delirious.

There were no medications involved in that birth. They didn’t offer me anything, and I didn’t even know enough to ask. I was completely clueless. I didn’t know how to push properly, and as a result, all the tiny capillaries in my face burst. A couple of days later, when I finally saw myself in a mirror, I was shocked at how I looked. The hospital where I gave birth was in a small town in Italy and there were no mirrors in the bathrooms, so I had been completely unaware of what I looked like.

The birth itself was textbook perfect. I only pushed for a few minutes, the doctor broke my water as the baby was coming out, and my baby was perfectly healthy, praise God! But I was very traumatized by the whole experience because of how unprepared I was for what childbirth would actually feel like.

I had heard from my grandmother, my mother, my aunts, and my cousins what childbirth involved, but knowing about something and actually experiencing it are two completely different things. The whole hospital could hear my screams!

My subsequent three births were just as painful, although the labors were about 12 hours instead of 24. All four births were completely natural and didn’t involve epidurals. I felt every contraction, every movement the baby made, and every single feeling of pain.

The whole experience of giving birth is incredible. It is something that is difficult to explain, and I know it is not the same for every woman, but for me it was the most painful and the most beautiful experience at the same time.

Childbirth is messy, there is no way to tidy it up. No matter how you try to describe it, birth is messy. It is raw. It is natural. It can be scary, overwhelming, painful, and completely awe-inspiring all at once. There is pain, pressure, blood, tears, groaning, screaming, exhaustion, and then suddenly, life.

There is something about childbirth that strips everything down. There is no pretending. There is no controlling how it looks, it's unpredictable, you're exposed, you're vulnerable, you're literally naked and you can't do anything about it! Your body takes over and you surrender to something much bigger than your own strength.

And somehow, in all of that mess and pain, something beautiful is happening.

Life is being brought forth.

With my other three births, I knew exactly what to expect, but that didn’t make the pain any less intense or the process less humbling. People often say that you forget the pain of childbirth, but I don’t think that is quite the right way to describe it.

I don’t think you forget.Your body remembers, it knows what to do because it has been there before. Your mind remembers what is coming and it's willing to go through the whole process again, because it knows the reward after that pain. Something inside of you says, “Hang in there. This is temporary. You know what is on the other side of this. Soon you will be holding your baby.”

It reminds me of a marathon runner.

When a runner begins a marathon, they already know what is coming. They know what their body is eventually going to feel. They know that exhaustion will come. They know their muscles will hurt, their body will feel the strain, and there may come a point when everything inside of them wants to stop.

But they don’t stop just because it hurts.

They knew before the race ever started that pain and exhaustion would be part of it.

And when the pain becomes intense, they keep going because they know there is a finish line ahead of them. They know that every step is bringing them closer to it. They know that if they keep going, eventually they will cross that line and finally be able to stop and rest.

That is what giving birth feels like to me.

This morning I came across a video of a woman giving birth in water. She was unmedicated. She was groaning, moaning, screaming, and pushing.

I can’t help becoming very emotional whenever I see a woman giving birth because I know what that place feels like. I know what she is feeling. I know what she is thinking. I know what her body is going through.

This was one of the most beautiful birth videos I have ever seen.

Her husband got into the water with her and stayed right beside her. He held her hand. He whispered to her. He encouraged her. He stayed close to her while she groaned and pushed and cried through the pain.

And then finally, the baby came.

She held that beautiful, precious child in her arms, and both of them were crying and laughing at the same time.

One moment she was groaning in pain.

The next moment she was holding what all that pain had been producing.

I was bawling as I watched the video, and that is when the Lord began to speak to me.

He said, “My beloved, do you see this picture? This is exactly the picture I want you to have in your mind as you are going through labor, as you wait for the promises, as you keep pushing, obeying, believing, and as you keep longing for Me to be with you as you go through the wilderness.

You see, I am right beside you. I am holding your hand. I am feeling your pain. I am encouraging you to keep going. I am with you in your tears, in your groaning and your moaning. I am with you in the valley, in the fire, and in the deep waters. I am with you through it all. I have never left you, and I will never leave you.”

And as He spoke, I began to understand even more deeply why childbirth is such a powerful picture of our spiritual lives.

Birthing the promises of God can be messy too.

Becoming who we are meant to be in Christ can be messy.

Dying to the old creation and becoming new is not a neat or comfortable process. Just as a caterpillar liquefies into a messy slop before it turns into a butterfly. There are things in us that have to die. There are things we have to surrender. There are patterns we have to let go of. There are places where God stretches us, corrects us, changes us, and asks us to trust Him when we cannot yet see the outcome.

Sometimes becoming who God created us to be is painful because we are leaving behind versions of ourselves we once needed in order to survive.

Obedience hurts, surrender hurts, and waiting hurts.

Becoming new feels like labor because something inside of us is being transformed while something else is being brought forth.

Something is being born.

If you find yourself in the middle of your labor right now, know that you are not alone. The Bridegroom Is next to His bride. He Is right there with you, holding you, strengthening you, feeling your pain, and caring for you through it all.

You may feel exhausted. You may feel like you have been waiting, pushing, obeying, believing, and holding on for so long. You may feel like you have nothing left to give. But don’t stop pushing, dear one.

You may be at the very end.

And sometimes the hardest part comes right before the birth.

Think again about that woman in the water. At the most painful part, her husband did not leave her. He stayed with her. He held her hand. He spoke to her. He remained close until the very end.

And this is exactly what our Father does.

He is with us in the pain, in the waiting, in the wilderness and in the tears.

And soon, very soon, after that final painful push, you will be holding the promises He has made to you.

Just like that mother who was crying and laughing as she held her baby after everything she had endured, there will come a moment when the pain and the waiting will give way to joy.

You will look at what you are finally holding and remember every moment you thought you could not keep going.

"Oh, hold on, My dear. Your breakthrough is near.”

Rosangela Atte

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